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Finding Your New Normal

20 Apr

Hey there! How is everyone doing out there? Here I am, in many ways I imagine, just like you doing my best to hunker down, lay low, play it safe and stay sane. I imagine also like you, my life has been rearranged in ways I wasn’t expecting. My living circumstances and location have changed. My surroundings have changed. My lifestyle has changed. And some days this is all okay. And other days it feels like everything just might come crumbling down. I have had my good days and I’ve had my bad moments and days.

As I was wading through some really intense emotions that I just didn’t know what to do with, I had a bit of a breakthrough. I needed to let it out. I got out my journal which had been neglected for nearly a year and wrote… and wrote and wrote. And I got out my drawing journal where I occasionally do a bit of colorful abstract meanderings, sharpened my colored pencils and just sort of went at it and… I feel a bit better. In the midst of all of this, I feel I’ve “figured out” a few things… so this is how it all looks to me.

Our lives have all wreaked havoc and our external “normal” has been stripped away. While this is uncomfortable and challenging, the opportunity here isn’t to get back to “normal” but to shift from within to a new normal. Let’s face it, our “normal” lives, while we were used to them and their familiarity, didn’t always work and left certain essential aspects of ourselves out in the cold. With our normal stripped away, it actually grants us an opportunity to disentangle from the trappings of that pattern that weren’t serving us and reconnect within to some of our inner lights that have been disconnected, forgotten, neglected or cast aside. I saw in myself all the large and small ways I had kicked important elements of myself “off the boat” for a variety of reasons – I didn’t have time, I felt I wasn’t good enough, I was more worried about making money. I was even ashamed of certain aspects of myself or too worried about what other people thought, so I ignored them or tossed them aside.

But here’s the deal, when we’re not being ourselves our lives don’t fully work. And while sometimes this may present a challenge as we feel people in our lives or society at large demand that we be a certain way, it truly is our life’s journey to become more aligned with who we really are. So as our normal is stripped away, it’s an opportunity to connect within to what feels true, soft, real for each of us personally and allow it – give it just a little breathing room to be. Through this experience we can transform from the inside out into a new normal.

Some of us may be feeling trapped, but perhaps the real trap is the myriad of ways we have cut ourselves off from our authentic selves. Access to freedom comes in reconnecting to ourselves and what is true for us if even in small ways.

So how do we do this?  I imagine this is a distinct journey for each of us, but here are few of my thoughts…

  1. Do something you love just for the joy of it. Not because it will get you something (recognition, approval, money, success) or that it is expected of you but simply because it’s a joy for you to do it. Let that be enough.
  2. Start a daily journal. It doesn’t have to be anything prolific or fancy but just a place where you can come daily to write down what’s so for you on this day. And if it inspires you, get yourself something cool, beautiful or fancy to write in.
    • Here’s a link to a pretty spiral bound notebook for journaling.
    • Here’s a great journal to revisit and chronicle your life called This Life of Mine by Anne Phyfe Palmer.
  3. Explore keeping a visual journal. This doesn’t have to be much, you can get a spiral bound blank sheet notebook and some colored pencils without much expense. Then just show up at the page daily or from time to time without judgement and just let it out.
  4. Support your journey with Young Living Essential Oils. I have to tell you, these oils have been a life saver in assisting me with moving through and transforming the emotional challenges and rocky roads that have come up recently along the journey. Favorites include Young Living Stress Away, Lavendar and Valor.  If you’re curious about these you can read more here and feel free to reach out.

One additional note of something I recognized in myself… it’s easy to blame those around us for any challenges or for feelings trapped. We’re all human – I know I am!  And truly some circumstances may work better than others or not be a fit for us. But as a starting point, I am seeing my own access to greater freedom comes from not looking outside but instead looking inside myself and beginning, one day at a time, to continue the journey of setting myself free as a launching point to a better “reality.”

Those are my musings for now from my temporary respite in the midwest. Wishing all of you the best in your own journey of excavation and finding your new normal!

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Trust Reiki

18 Apr

I started practicing the Usui Shiki Ryoho tradition of Reiki more than 15 years ago now. I was introduced to Reiki in a synchronistic passing with a neighbor on Carrollton Ave in New Orleans, LA.  “You should try Reiki” he suggested and it was as if a little bell rang in my ear. “Yes I should!” I thought.  A few weeks later I saw a Reiki flyer at the local yoga studio which connected me with a class by Reiki Master Elizabeth Ohmer Pellgrin.  And so my Reiki journey began.

I’ll be honest with you, my beginnings with Reiki started off a bit choppy. My body was so wracked with the depth of recent challenges and a lifetime of “holding on tight” in the midst of traumatic circumstances that when I gave myself Reiki my body practically convulsed and the energy was met with my own habitual resistance.  “Trust Reiki” Elizabeth encouraged and I did, continuing with my daily practice. “I am turning into a gloworm” I joked as I noticed a palpable shift in my body and being with regular self Reiki treatments.

I was fortunate to become part of a vibrant Reiki community. We met regularly for group treatments in various circles all over town. I made new friends and connections and Elizabeth was a steadfast support in my journey. I felt swept up and supported in a whole new way that formed the beginning of a new foundation.

A few years later when Hurricane Katrina hit New Orleans and we were dispersed everywhere, Reiki was there. I met up with Elizabeth in Austin, TX  for a private second degree class. I can still remember sitting at the kitchen table in my temporary Austin abode excited and enchanted by the new leg of my journey.

Elizabeth shared the story of asking her first Reiki teacher, Ken Bower, the difference between first and second degree. He said, “Honey, first degree is like driving a Volkswagen. Second degree is like driving a Lamborghini.” Elizabeth said “Ken, how can you compare something as spiritual as Reiki to cars?”  He smiled and said, “You’ll see!” About two minutes later he pointed to a fancy car Elizabeth had never seen before. She raised her eyebrows and said “What?” He smiled and said “THAT’S a Lamborghini” as it sped off like a jet!

With second degree I began to support myself and others in new ways. A few years later when I took a leap and left the United States and began an unexpected international adventure, Reiki was there.  As someone who was very sensitive and still challenged by simple and day to day things, Elizabeth encouraged me to send Reiki to those in our community not only to support them, but to support me. Amazingly, as I began to devote more time daily to the practice of sending Reiki to others, my own challenges and discomforts lessened.  It felt like through sending I was becoming aligned with that energy and the more I stayed there, the better I felt.

I had the opportunity one year to attend the Northwest Reiki gathering at Breitenbush in Oregon.  I loved not only meeting and connecting with other Reiki practitioners and learning from the wisdom of the Masters, but also soaking in that energy for a weekend. I was at a crossroads in my work life at the time and I’ll never forget, after bathing in Reiki all weekend I just KNEW what I needed to do. In my “ordinary life” the choice that it supported may have seemed like a risk, but after a weekend of Reiki it felt like walking on solid ground.

As the years have gone by, Reiki has been my refuge, as I lean thickly and heavily on my daily self hands-on practice and hearty distant practice. As my New Orleans community has dispersed and grown, we still stay connected via a second degree Facebook group.  In this group we share our own Reiki requests and those in our community and send Reiki regularly. This daily devotion has become one of the pillars in my life and where I turn to provide a foundation for myself in the midst of ordinary life as well as crisis and challenges.

I am someone who has experienced a lot of upheaval and challenge. This includes physical and mental health challenges and challenges from the past. I had my apartment and all my belongings destroyed by Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans and then once again all my belongings were destroyed a few years later in a leaky storage unit in the hot humid city.  This launched me on an unexpected five year extravaganza abroad filled with interesting but also challenging twists and turns living in Europe and Asia. And in the past few years, my North Carolina apartment flooded, which began my house and pet sitting tour of the United States which has lasted over a year now. Through it all, Reiki was and continues to be there. My steady practice lays the stones that one by one support the building of an unshakable home no matter what is happening in my life or where I am.

In the midst of new challenges and in the wake of my journey and experiences, I hear the words of my teacher and the many teachers among her and before her. Trust Reiki.

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Day Trippin’

26 Aug

As I haven’t had any international escapades in some time, or much wandering of any kind really… it’s time for this gypsy soul to have a little movement. No big agenda, no big plans. But for now – a little day-tripping. You know how it goes… getting out of the familiar, if even just an hour or so away, and exploring some new territory.

How lucky am I that my current abode is seated right in the heart of some astounding natural beauty. So off I’ve been exploring some of the area… not too far away, but still getting out of town!

Caesars Head State Park

Just a 45 minute drive and I found myself in South Carolina at Caesars Head State Park. A gentle mostly scenic journey, I easily made my way to the visitor’s center and checked things out.  The park staff directed me up the road to the top attraction, the view. While my glimpse at the scenic overlook was shall we say… a bit foggy ( it was like staring out into a white abyss…)… thankfully, after a brief hiking excursion when I returned I had a better view. It was something like this.

View Caesars Head State Park
Triple Falls

DuPont State Forest

This well traveled North Carolina Park packs a powerful waterfall punch! Strung together by a series of mild to moderate (at times somewhat steep!) trails, this friendly well marked park is a breeze for getting out into nature and taking in some breathtaking scenery. How fortunate to have such amazing blasts of nature not too far down the road.

The waterfalls of DuPont State Forest include Hooker Falls, Triple Falls and High Falls. My favorite was High Falls. I also loved the base of Triple Falls. There I climbed the somewhat extensive series of steps to find my way to the base. How satisfying it was just to be in its presence and to take in not only the beauty but the feel of the falls.

High Falls

Swamp Rabbit Trail

Swamp Rabbit Trail Travelers Rest

This 22 mile rails-to-trails greenway runs from Greenville, SC to just beyond Travelers Rest, SC. Greenville is about 50 minutes south of me so I made an afternoon of it and checked out the area a bit.

As my ankle never fully recovered from a tumble down some stairs in France, I am always on the lookout for new flat places to walk – kind of a odd exploration when you live in the mountains!  Nonetheless, I continue my quest!

I started in Travelers Rest, the trail end closest to me. I parked my car near the heart of downtown and took in the scenery. The trail was easy to find – friends and families out on a Sunday afternoon mostly pedalling and some walkers on the trail alongside the road. I checked out the small collection of restaurants and shops blossoming near the trail. And when my curiosity was satisfied, I headed for the trail myself.

Swamp Rabbit Trail Greenville

True confession – I perhaps “cheated” just a bit in my first Swamp Rabbit excursion. As I was on foot, I quickly decided this portion of the trail is perhaps best suited for cyclers. I walked for …just a bit… in Travelers Rest as bicyclers buzzed by and not too much scenery to take in for the “slow travelers.”  I soon decided to return to my car, drive to Greenville and check out the other end of the trail. Kind of like reading the first page of a book and then skipping to the ending…

I caught the trail again in Greenville at Falls Park in the heart of the city. A tiny little green refuge in the midst of Greenville’s small but notable city bustle, the park features a man-made waterfall and hooks you right up with the Swamp River trail.

Falls Park on the Reedy Greenville

Paris Mountain State Park

Lake Placid Loop Trail

Just outside of Greenville, I found my way to this park as part of a little shopping excursion. Always great to get back to nature when out and about! While this park doesn’t offer the “blow you away” kind of nature, it was still a satisfying immersion and connection with some trees, earth and water – ah, something that always soothes the soul! A gentle loop trail around the lake (helpful for those of us with a history of getting… shall we say… misdirected out in nature) this simple diversion was a welcome and restoring break!

Dam at Lake Placid

How about you? Have you done any day trippin’ lately? What a way to go when you just need to get away, take a break and change the scenery a bit!

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This is Thailand

17 Sep

It’s been a not too busy workday, thankfully nearing the end of the week. We are closing in on the end of the semester in Thailand and will soon enjoy a well-deserved break.  As you may have noticed, the school year in Thailand starts at the beginning of May, still thickly entrenched in hot season.  It then cruises on through rainy season (still hot, but some relief with the rain) until the end of September.  We then get a few weeks hiatus until we come back to do it all again.

While it seems the teachers are more weary and the students more distracted, the end of the semester has brought with it a few unexpected but appreciated breaks.  A class cancelation here, an unexpected day off there. I am told the school where I teach, while well-respected, is known as “the fun school.”  In some countries this may not be the best of reputations… but in Thailand, with its loose ways and less serious bend towards academics, it seems it is a good thing.  It is not unusual to see traditionally dressed students adorned in make-up and flowers missing class for a dance rehearsal or a whole day of class cancelations for a celebration or event.

There is a phrase that I have heard many times from other foreigners living in Thailand.  It casually goes… “well… this is Thailand…(T.I.T.)”  And in this phrase, especially if you’ve spent any time here, you begin to understand or at least accept its wavy ways.  At times anything goes and the one thing you can count on is the unexpected. It’s not unusual to find a crooked mismatch of information and reality that to the “foreign western mind” might insight… frustration.  But the lesson is… to go with the flow… and to “get”… even if you don’t really get it… that… well “this is Thailand…”

A simple example of this is a Saturday afternoon just a few weeks ago.  The foreign elementary teachers, myself included, worked a hard, hot Saturday at an English camp for select students.  After a decent, but undeniably hot and funky day of work, we returned to our on-campus abodes only the find… there was no running water.  If ever there was a time that I wanted running water, coated by a full layer of grime and sweat from the day, it was then.  But you know what… this is Thailand.  And, this happens… and has happened on several occasions.  The water goes out, electricity, wifi… you name it.  The trick is to try not to let it get to you… and go with the flow.

In this circumstance… we did just that.  Our room water may have been off, but mother nature thankfully was providing us with a shower of her own.  While many things are unreliable in Thailand, during rainy season an afternoon shower is something you can often count on.  With the “faucet” turned on, I took my showering outside and just stood (fully clothed, mind you) in the rain and let the water cool me down, rinse me off.  I was soon joined by other teachers, a few attempting to actually shampoo their hair in the rain… which had a few complications of its own.  But we did it… and in truth, while definitely not what I would have “wanted” or planned… it was really kind of freeing and refreshing and set me in a better place for the rest of the day.

It’s mid-September and the idea is more fully and easily settling in that… Thailand is hot.  I was told before arriving that it was “summer here all year long”… but I didn’t really get it.  Arriving in May to a shockingly stifling heat, I was relieved when the rainy season crept it.  With a few cooler days, I innocently thought that heat was over.  But, while it’s much better now then when I arrived in May, a steamy morning or hot afternoon is never far away.

I recently taught “seasons” as a lesson for one of my classes.  It was worthwhile to note that Thai students have no experience of the four seasons.  While “spring, summer, winter and fall” may be the seasons to “us” and the ones taught in the English books… here in Thailand they know them as hot season, rainy season, and cold season.  The four seasons are really just a concept we teach them about.  Speaking of which, did you know that in Thailand it’s the year 2558?… Their calendar is based on Buddhism and is known as B.E. which stands for Buddha Era.

Wow, well here I am truly a world away.  Not without my western comforts of course.  A fancy mall and movie theater down the street, air conditioning in my room where I stay, near western quality grocery stores.  The internet too brings a good dose of “home” wherever I am in the world.  But still, as I wander around this busy campus where I work and live I am undeniably a world away.  With my sometimes frantic western ways, it’s still at least a little surprise to see the many easy smiling faces of the house keepers and other staff riding their bicycles around campus while I am often lost in my own thoughts or hurried business.  A lesson to learn? Perhaps….and Indeed.

With that said, how are things in whatever hemisphere you are occupying?  It’s always good to hear from you!

So long for now from my quiet campus home.  I am soaking in some of my favorite “western comforts” until I get up and do it all again tomorrow!

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