Warm Season

19 Oct

Well, despite the cold arriving here in Wettenbostel… a warm season has been predicted in my life…. by our bicycling traveling German friend still here in Wettenbostel…  I will accept that prediction.  And look forward to it… with gratitude.

My loyal porch companion and American friend Dan has moved on to new pastures as Sunday he left for Switzerland.  A bittersweet departure seeing a friend move on.  But…  I did move into his room… for now my room.  I can still feel and smell his presence in there.  The ghost of Dan gently guiding me… tapping me in this direction and that on how to be a good caretaker of myself and the Seminar Haus while I am here.  Perhaps some of it will rub off on me.

I am learning how to stay warm in cold Northern Germany… as we have already had our first frost and some of the beautiful flowers and vegetables in the garden are wilting in defeat.  I am heeding well to good intentioned tips like keeping my warm wool socks on the heater to keep them warm and dry and seeking to keep my hands, neck and feet warm.  My scarf is my constant companion.  Learning to make pots of tea to travel with me during the day and basking in the sun whenever possible.  But in addition to learning to keep my body warm and doing so gently and gingerly… I am learning to keep me heart warm.  Just a little.  Beginning to let loose of some of the jagged and prickly edges locked into place like a frozen ghost.  Allowing for a space… if ever so brief… to let go of my thoughts and be in the moment with kindness, good feelings…and warmth.  Ah.  Letting go of the past… the jagged ridged actions of reacting to so much…trying to keep my hand on everything all at once. The forced persistence after hurricane Katrina and other things.  Ah.  A warm season beginning in me as the cool frost sneaks in.

I am feeling so much energy shifting right now.  It seems that so much is changing although as I look around me I cannot say exactly what.  It feels as if I am riding on a rush of energy somehow changing my life… and where it will end I am not sure.  For now I explore keeping my focus is the present although my mind likes to wander and consider what will happen next… like the exciting next episode of a longed for drama series.  Surrender is the call.  I see it sitting next to me… smiling its devilish grin.  Waiting for me to let go and fall to the ways of the unknown.  Intuition seems to be the guide.. finding my way through the dark and unseen.

My beloved computer is now on its way to working again.  New hard drive and system in place I am happily now typing on my own keyboard.  Only one thing is different.  My computer has been through a transformation.  It now speaks German.  German system software, German keyboard… And for now… my computer speaks German better than I do.  My loyal computer repair friends have assured me they will look for system software that speaks English.  But in the meantime I am getting to know my old friend with a foreign twist.

Things are a little quieter again here in Wettenbostel.  With Dan gone and the peak of energy from the weekend party died down… it is now mostly myself and our visiting bicycling friend….fending our way through the cold and warmth of Wettenbostel…. with occasional visits from our hosts and regular electrician, general handyman and friend.  So here I am.  One step at a time.  One day at a time.  Exploring and beginning to find warmth in the cold.

Photo Deep in the Garden by Michael Hartley

One Response to “Warm Season”

  1. michaelstjohnhartley 21/10/2011 at 11:45 #

    Nice to read, nice to see you here in wettenbostel….Have a great day.

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